THE TIME TO DECIDE

Once again, the creature he lets inside the house is the ultimate proof the house will once again smell like the combination of tobacco and weed, the house will get another fresh infestations of bedbugs, something that is a clear sign of poverty, alongside occasional guests who chew more khat than he can. Many times, I will spend more of my time in the roofs of others, mainly because I have no plate of food for me back in the Barracks, and the anaemia I recovered from through being inside the roofs of others was the clear sign I have never been safe near my own people. As I look around, it sinks in deeper; I am the only one left who has a plan in life, and the anaemia which blacked me out in some dizzy, fatigued situations contributed to me creating among the following:

Thankfully, for me, there’s a reason why substances didn’t get me attached to the headrushes temporary pleasures blinded many through.

I’m normally given a week to my own, and in that one week, I am able to stay under a roof I never saw as a place I belong; mainly because the building became the baton held by another athlete who digs his own grave through temporary pleasures and more toxicity hidden in the manipulation I work real hard to walk away from.

I knew one day the time would come when I was going to make the life changing decision involving cutting ties with toxic ones who have been using blood and my anaemic severity as the excuse to cling to my life.

The neighbors were just as shocked as I was the moment they all saw him in the present time; more inclined to be addicted to the substances which dug up our own graves by blinding us more about the most pleasurable of headrushes.

I’ve never done this before, but I don’t see any other time to make my own decisions, considering the direction of my life involves decisions whose prices I am willing to pay, and in equal measure, whose prices cost me more than I thought.

Considering that it was a building to me, I saw no reason to stay. However, I wasn’t going to start emptying accounts to cover up the month, adding more frustration and staying in a cycle of disappointed efforts to get rich quick.

I had to ensure the moment I was walking away from the building, I was definitely sure about where I was going, who I was to be spending time with, and who I even listened to, for I had never walked away from a building before, knowing that my soul was not going to see its expiry date in a building I never felt at home in.

The year had come when there was no turning back, and considering I was walking on my own road, it wasn’t just clear to me I was now my own nurturing parent… I never did any of this before, I didn’t know who to turn to, or even get a glimpse of what tomorrow brought the moment I walked away from all whose blood they used to manipulate me.

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© HAROUN RISA 2022. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

Published by Haroun Risa

Actor. Author. Writer. Palm Reader.

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